From a fan…

It was 1996, May or June. We had just shifted to a new home. Those days, we had no TV, heck we didn’t even have an electricity connection for few months. It was one such Saturday evening when I first heard the song “Mehandi legate rekhna..” from the neighbour’s TV. I think it was the famous countdown show of DD2, Ek Se Badhkar Ek (?). In and out just like that but I kept humming the tune for many years to come. Of course, I didn’t know that the song was from the iconic movie of our times and the actor was soon to be my favourite!

SRK.

Growing up in a strict and conservative household meant movies were off limit, especially Hindi movies. I was allowed to watch just two programs that aired Hindi songs, Rangoli on Sunday mornings and Chitrahaar on Wednesdays evenings. I still remember how I used to pray hard for just one song of SRK and when that happens, I noted down everything, the song, its lyrics, the backgrounds, the other actors, the clothes and of course cute SRK. Those days he was very cute, especially in the song from Chamtkar, which was aired repeatedly!!

Most weeks, the wait would be futile. I and my friends would discuss in anger and frustrations. It seems crazy, now that I think of those days, yet I can relive those moments again and again.

The thrill to sneak out to our living room just to watch the Hindi movies that aired in DD on Friday and Saturday nights is giving me goosebumps :).So as to not wake my parents, I used to watch the movie with no light and sound. It was hard, but then I didn’t want to miss the chance to watch SRK !! Baazigar was the first movie I watched of SRK and boy I was flabbergasted, like with everyone else. I too fell for the “Baazigar”, even though he killed a lot of people(?).

Why? The answer still eludes me.

Since then I was hooked. I devoured all the movies that aired on TV. I would become sad if his character dies, use to ponder how could he be saved leading to an alternative storyline. I was enthralled when he cracked jokes, made faces, sang songs, said those filmy dialogues. I loved the way he looked onscreen when he acted as if he was telling stories directly to us :D. I loved his voice, voice modulations, teary eyes, his dimpled smile and so on and so forth!!. Growing up, he and his movies defined my childhood and teenage!!

From Kabhi haa Kabhi naa

giphy

to Kuch Kuch Hota Hai

tenor

 

Add a lot of raging hormones plus the excitements on breaking restrictions and a lot of enthusiasm and love to understand the phenomenon of my love for him 🙂

As with now, we didn’t have internet, heck we didn’t know when his movies released or how well it did. The only source of knowing anything about him was the priced Filmfare magazines which I used to devour when I visited my most hi-fi cousins during vacations. It was long but worthwhile wait!! I used to beg, borrow steal pictures from these and made a huge book of SRK. I know,  Finding and collecting his pictures from magazines or newspapers used to be the most important activity of my childhood. And the barter system of exchanging pictures with friends :D, but SRK was in high demand,even those times :).

tumblr_inline_o3f6xnENmI1tiw6r6_1280

Ah, the good old times :).

When we bought a cassette player with stereos, a big deal back then, for the first time, my tyrant father bought me Dil Se cassette and my mom bought me Dil to Pagal Hai cassette. And those were treasured moments which I still have. Those had these amazing pictures of SRK,which I used to stare at :D. We all used to be in awe, seeing SRK dance on top of the train. My four-year-old daughter also has the same awe which I am absolutely happy about 😉

And it was much later when I got my own job and had a chance to stay away from my home, I got to watch his movie in a theatre, “My Name is Khan”.I was mesmerised by seeing him onscreen. The usual SRK was not seen at all. His eyes were so very different. “Tere naina…kept ringing in my head.I clearly remember once the movie got over, I was unable to speak or even move. I wonder what would become of me when I meet him. To be able to watch “DDLJ” in Maratha Mandir “DDLJ” in Maratha Mandir is one of my biggest dreams!! I wish it still keeps running.

 

So, why do people including me are crazy about SRK. Well, even I don’t think of him as exceptionally handsome or even talented. Yet, we all love him. I think it’s because we believe him and know him like an open book especially when the rest of the stars were distant. We know his love life, his struggle, his ambitions, his wishes almost everything about him. We think we know all about him and yet he is still able to maintain who he is amidst everything!! He is a great actor, a versatile one,  a humble one, respects everyone, treats everyone equally, is a great lover of sports, tech, and a big patriot, a good father, a great better half, a good orator, a sensible and a sensitive person! I can keep adding more adjectives 😉

Right now I am in such a stage where I enjoy his deep and thought-provoking talks along with his masala movies.

OR

And the recent TED Talks,

tells you how good orator he is. His style of quick and witty responses, makes you wonder. His huge collection of books is another main attraction ;).And when he quotes them, I die of joy!!. To others, he seems arrogant, selfish and too much nonsense, for instance, someone like my husband. But there is a quintessential charm that he leaves on every person, be it his fan or not.

Today there are a lot of venues available to get instant fame or responses, but back then the wait to see you sir, has been the most bittersweet ones.Well, as a fan of yours, I don’t want any 300 cr movies or record-breaking ones. I just want him to keep doing movies which you love and enjoy, just to take care of yourself and keep us happy with your witty one-liners in Twitter or with hot after bath pictures in Instagram :D.

Its been 22 years, and never another person has touched my life like you, Mr Superstar. :D. Once your fan always your fan.Here’s to wishing my biggest superstar  a “Happy Birthday”

A Fangirl!!

Tell me!

Disguised in the thoughtfulness,
I wake up to shameful taunts

Disguised in the forgetfulness,
I feel invalidated

Disguised in the sweet words for the ​world,
I see the burning hatred in eyes

Disguised in the disgust for me,
I hear the smirks and smiles

Disguised in finding me a new home,
I feel the tightening of the ​grip

Disguised in the busyness,
I find my dreams crushed and levelled

Disguised in the love,
I touch the height of hypocrisy​

Disguised in the helplessness​,
I share my tearful stains on pillows

Tell me, How do I love again?

Recurring Dream! #writeup

I ran…ran as fast as I could, as far as I could. Without a sense of direction, I fled in that one momentary lapse of his attention, in all these years, from this small, dark, and stingy, dungeon in this deep forest.

I had with me, a recurring dream…the last thing, I believe, I  remember of a past, I had. It fuelled my escape from this hopelessness.

” The long-lasting dream.

The last thing I ever remember of life.

The last place I saw,  from where I was abducted.

The last place I was warned not to be…

It stood tall, even after all these years…covered in green moss, beautiful and unloved, showing a way

Way-Stone”

In my pounding heart, I can already feel the calmness of a home, somewhere nearby!!

stone-in-the-wood

Pic courtesy – Sue Vincent

     

 

Linking for the #writephoto challenge.

writephoto

Weekend Bliss​​

I was alone in my balcony with a cup of hot tea, on a lazy Saturday morning, err… actually afternoon amidst the boring discussions in Whatsapp chats.

While my growling stomach reminded me of food and an empty fridge, the piles of laundry made me hunt for my faithful old jeans and the white tunic.

A happy me and grumpy stomach lead my way to “Paradise Biriyani House”, which served the best combo of biriyani with raita,uff….better than any pizza in the world.

With my tummy full, I decided to pass by my favourite bookstore, which much to my surprise was hosting a “Book Sale” and I was not the one to let go of the opportunity to buy a few more, even if I have dozens of unopened ones!!.

Just as I reached home, with a lot of books and a biriyani parcel it started raining heavenly, which reminded me that tomorrow was only Sunday!!.

This moment, this moment is what I call…a classic weekend moment!!.

azure_28c0050d903a6c9595848b9656cdf62c

***

Linking it with the prompt “Classics” for Six Sentence Stories

six-sentence-story-copy

*raita / *biriyani

Pics courtesy – Google Images 🙂

My travel diary!

If I really take a hard look at my travel diaries, there are no glamorous destinations or any rich experinces but yet every place I have visited had given me some of the most cherished moments of my life.Like the first flight I took to Chennai or the first boat trip in oceans of Andaman or the visiting the famous Taj Mahal.Nonetheless it was all very exciting and simply pompous things that I could share with my friends.

These journeys to many of the touristy places with my family as a child or as a teenager, I saw only the monuments or structures and the stories of the kings who built them or any story behind it as a passe. I had a epitome of emotions only after I started travelling alone.The incredible beauty of the places I visited as a child increased many folds when I was able to see it through my eyes.Be it the flower motifs or the lasting inks of paintings everything made sense as if a story is being told.Even if its a lake or a waterfall the beauty seems to quadraupled when traveled alone with all the time in your hands.

I noticed that more importantly,I began to appreciate the journey as much as the destinations.The whiff of wind of every place was different, sometimes its the blooming flowers of the season other occasions the drying crops..even the drying cow dung told a story or so I felt.The normal buses or sleeper coaches or even the general train seats captured my senses more than I could have imagined.And it helped me find a little freedom in my otherwise tied down lifestyle.

I also felt that the same places have different set of beauty when seasons changes like the snowing kashmir with the frozen Dal lake to the shimmering of wild blooms and a Shikkar ride on Dal lake,which made me appreciate my life even better, in our lives, how the sometimes the same people or certain memories give us a different warmth,just like seasons!The same memories which get imprinted with us even without loosing any of the details can become quite difficult to be rememebered no matter how hard we tried.

Now if we are able to keep aside all of our problems and issues of life and simply go on forward with an open mind, just reminding ourself that even a walk to buy vegetables may become an enriching experience.We dont need to travel to exotic locations or take selfies every moment to capture the essence of our lives, sometimes we just need to be present, at the moment, physically and spiritually.

So SayYesToTheWorld   all the experiences it has to offer to us and take up every opportunity that comes on our way, make some great plans or dont make plans, have a bucket list or a blind list ,make anything happen or simply wait,never want everything to be completely be figured out or never feel sorry for not having done this before. Just seize the moment and go on a blind date with yourself and explore our beautiful world both inside and outside!”

I’m blogging about #TheBlindList and #SayYesToTheWorld for Indiblogger.Checkout this wonderful video as well.

Google,all pictures your courtsey!

 

A furlough…

It’s been a long time…

At the dawn of my withdrawal, I missed this place and with every chance, I wandered over here.

Slowly, with life happening, I could not catch up which sadly and steadily culminated in the absolute negligence of this wonderful nook in my life…

Then when I was ready to come to tell stories, there crept a strange unfamiliarity with the flow of words, as though they fail to get written in here…

I abandoned my journey for quite some time as it felt distant and unresponsive…and the place where I enjoyed felt like a strained relationship with myself…

Today, after a long hiatus, I somehow mustered up the courage to just start…